A warm congrats to Margaret and her new bundle Edward, weighing in at 9lbs, 9oz. So proud of you!
Today I want to talk to you about the "Pendulum Swing".
A few of my clients are on similar paths and so I wanted to share this in case it sounds like you as well. Often before we start this work, we're in a place of feeling like it's never going to happen. And then we begin to be aware of our energy and that many things that we're believing like- I'm too old, and there's only a 50% chance-etc actually AREN'T true. And we begin to align with the idea that maybe we can do this. And then we can definitely do this. And we're excited to do this. And it's totally happening!!! And we swing all the way over to the other end of the pendulum.
And then we get our period. Again.
So what the hell happened? Where did I go wrong? Is it just not possible? Maybe I'm not like other people, maybe this crap doesn't work. And you swing back to the other end of the pendulum, and so it goes. We feel like we shouldn't put all of our eggs in one basket because it will hurt too much.
That last thought is the enemy right there. We are afraid to commit all of our energy because we feel like if it doesn't work, then we will still survive. Then we won't have lost everything. And some of us think, well "I AM putting all my energy into this. I really really really really want it. I think about it 24/7"!
Here's the thing: We're in HOPE mode versus MANIFESTATION mode.
When we're in desperation, fear and obsessing: What if he doesn't come, I NEED to be a mother, etc, we're coming from a place of attachment. When we're in a place of being so scared that the baby won't come, or NEEDING him to come, we're attached to an outcome. Now you might say , "Well DUH, of course I'm scared and of course I want him".The thing is, according to the Law of Attraction, like energy attracts like energy. So if we live in "oh god what if he doesn't come" or "I really really need him to come", The Universe is hearing the lack- the fear brings more fear and the need brings more need. And it becomes this spinning merry-go-round that we can't seem to get off. And this is especially hard if you've been "trying" for awhile to no avail. Your brain thinks- well, it's been hard, so it's going to continue to BE hard. So what do we do??
When we're in HOPE mode, we're putting our power in someone else's hands- God, Universe, doctors- everywhere BUT ourselves. We are waiting for the thing in the sky to cue the stork whenever it's ready while you writhe in anxiety.
When we're in MANIFESTATION mode, we're in a CHOOSING energy instead of the attachment. How do we move toward that choosing energy?
- The first thing is to get back into your body- it helps alleviate the type-A, analytical brain tendencies and helps us plug back into our intuition- the place where our soul knows what we're capable of. So dance in your living room, go earthing, biking, exercise, yoga, meditation, knitting etc
- Do a daily drop in to connect with your intuition and your baby to be. Put one hand on your heart or belly. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth, and FEEL, don't think.
- Make a list of what IS going right in your life. It's so important to be coming from a place of gratitude. We want to be putting out what we're grateful for so the Universe can return more things to be grateful for.
- Make a list of why it hasn't been the right time until now. This is especially helpful if you've had a previous miscarriage or termination.I guarantee you there's a reason it didn't happen then. Maybe you moved, relationship wasn't steady, work was crazy etc. Actually write it down- don't think it. There's something about seeing it on paper where you're like "No WONDER it didn't happen yet". It can help your brain let go of the energy that it's hard or should have happened already.
- Make list of reasons why it's likely that you WILL get pregnant and put it EVERYWHERE. Things like: I'm totally healthy, the doctor hasn't found anything wrong with me, I'm going to be a great mom, women have done this for milennia and I am no different from them, my husband and I are in a great place, we have a loving home and are financially stable, of COURSE this baby is coming!
- Focus on what you want instead of what you don't want. We as humans do fear and "what if" really well. And as explained above, when you're in that place, it attracts more of that fear. So let's put out what's we'd LOVE to see in our existence. Don't kill me, but make another list. Like- I'd love to see that positive sign on the stick, I'd love to tell my husband in _______way, I'd love to see her heartbeat in that sonogram, feel her first kick etc. Once you make this list, go back and FEEL into each one. How does it feel in your body? Goosebumps? Tingling? Smiling? Crying? Laughing? That's when things change on a cellular level. So FEEL like you've never felt before!
It takes much less energy to be in this place, and allows the Universe to answer with like energy that we actually want.
These months where you're figuring it out and shifting your energy, try to cut yourself a break and not blame yourself, God or the Universe. Know that what's happening is supposed to be. So if you didn't get pregnant this month it doesn't mean you're not going to. AT ALL! It just means there's something left to work through that's taking energetic precedence at the moment. And approaching it from an exploratory place keeps you moving forward and out of the wheel spinning. That's when you know your pendulum is in the middle. But it's okay, and even necessary to swing from one side to the other. You'll land back in the middle. And if you need some help, I'm an email away.
Lots of love!