Will you spiral or shine?

June 1, 2014

With this work I do, you'd think I'd be more aware of when I need a break. I think a lot of you can probably relate- between job, spouse, kids, activities etc it's hard to take time for yourself. We are so often in task mode, or survivial mode- just wanting to "get it done". It's a work in progress for sure. I had no idea how much I needed a break until I was sitting on the deck of our rental house in Martha's Vineyard and let out a deep, audible sigh. I have been going to Martha's Vineyard for 16 years, and being a New England girl to begin with; there's just something so peaceful and centering about the Vineyard, and it felt nice to plug back in to ME for a little bit. A good reminder that I need to be doing something every day to plug in to myself , whether it's meditating, going for a walk or just listening to music I find inspiring.

Now May is hit or miss weather-wise on Martha's Vineyard, but we went up for my dear friend's wedding ( the picture is part of the table setting from the wedding). He is the one who introduced me to this haven, and I was a nanny for his step-siblings and remain close to the family to this day. So my college roommates and their husbands, and my brother (who was shooting the wedding) and sis-in-law joined in renting a house for the week. I fully expected to get a couple of beach days. I certainly did NOT expect it to be 44 degrees and raining,or to get a piece of glass stuck on my foot or get cut on both barbed wire and a serrated pie tin (don't ask). Initially disappointing of course. And I think the detatched me would have let that spiral into "we wasted money", "it's not worth it if we didn't get to the beach", "vacation is ruined" etc...

But the re-connected me looked around and said, "I've got some of my best friends and family here. We're having a great time- we're laughing so hard our faces hurt. We've had some days that didn't rain and got to go out and experience the things the Vineyard has to offer other than the beaches. I got to show my friends around the island I love so much. I got to see one of my dearest friends get married. I didn't HAVE to be anywhere, didn't have a schedule. I got to breathe and relax. Our house was gorgeous. I connected with a bunch of people that I love." THAT is a vacation.

I need a reminder just as much as any other human: Things are not going to go as planned. You have no control over that. What you do have control over is how you move forward from it. Will you spiral, or will you shine? Too often we tend to look at things happening "to us" instead of "for us". Next time something doesn't go your way, try shifting your thoughts to grateful and positive. You'd be surprised how much more positivity it attracts, and you're back on track MUCH quicker than if you mourn the loss of your "perfect scenario".

PS- This just in: Perfect doesn't exist.  Which is...Perfect.


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